American Dust

A random blog that features things like soccer, politics, personal financial advise, and sometimes comics.

The New Batman Movie

Posted by americandust on June 27, 2008

  Okay, as the ad campaign is about to heat up for the new Batman movie let me make some comments before the ads trample any other thoughts anyone might have about the movie.  First, I have not seen a single trailer for the film other then the teaser that showed the costume and the Joker’s face.  But I can already tell you the plot.  I’ll get to that in a minute.

  Let me really start by saying that of everyone I know only two people didn’t love the first movie-myself and another friend who has a long history of reading Batman comics.  We both would have prefered that Frank Miller’s Year One story be directed by, well, Frank Miller.  Likewise we both would have loved his script be used instead of the bastardized version they used.  We both would have loved to see the whole romance dropped from the storyline (seriously, is there a law that a new female must discover Batman’s identity in every movie?).  Also, come on, that whole training scene was stolen directly from the 1980’s Sci-Fi classic Highlander (only they added snow).  Do I even need to mention the two plot wholes big enough to drive a bat-hummer through?  Here’s some dialogue that you could add over the score to two big scenes…

“I will not kill you.  Oh wait, it’s about two minutes later and the entire building is on fire but I’m going to run out of here and let you die anyway.  Yep, that makes sense to me.”

And then at he climax of the movie:

 “Sorry honey, I’m going to have to leave you and this little kid up on this building surrounded by poor people who’ve been driven insane so I can rush to the rich, white part of town to save the important people!  Hope you somehow get out of this and somehow the crazy people are cured immediately even though the scientist already said it’d be weeks before they make enough antidote.”

Anyway… here’s my prediction on the plot:  Joker appears, Batman blames himself for somehow inspiring the Joker, then Batman doubts himself as he struggles to deal with the joker.  Batmans girl of the month is torn between Batman and the crimefighting DA Harvey Dent (who fights bad guys legally and doesn’t wear spandex).  Joker kills girl (she’s expendable, she’s not important and new girl will learn his secret next movie because hollywood can’t stand a movie that doesn’t have a romance).  Dent is hurt physically and emotionally and this sets him off on the road to become Two-Face. Yadda yadda yadda… Batman is even more conflicted and seriously thinks about commiting the final vegelante act.. but doesn’t.  Batman saves day.

Oh, and yes, they’re going to give dead guy Ledger an award even though lets be honest, acting as a complete over the top character is much easier then bringing subtlety to a normal character.  But he’s dead, so he wins.

Movie will suck for the hardcore fans but be loved by everyone esle for it’s “original” take on the Dark Knight. 

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